Friday, January 15, 2010

Getting Old and Managing to Still Be Married!

Today is finally Friday and I am looking forward to a fantastic weekend of networking at a great conference on Saturday. I love meeting people and networking is a one of many ways to meet them.

My title today is "Getting Old and Managing to Still be Married." Some people may see getting old as depressing. I visualize getting old as being happy and healthy. I like to look at one side of a coin with a happy face, and the other with a sad face. I choose to take the happy face. After all they say a smile is a frown turned upside down. The married part I'm not to sure about yet.

Some people are afraid of getting old and being put into a nursing home or an assisted living home. Many actually are. Ever go into a nursing home? I'm sure some of you have at one time or another. Is it depressing? Do you see happy faces or sad faces? I suppose it depends on the nursing home. Let's just say not all assisted living facilities are like the movie "cocoon."

I took a walk the other day and saw the cutiest couple walking and holding hands. I would say they were in their late 70's. They were walking slow and talking together. I wondered how they lasted so long together. I wondered how many children they had, and if they traveled a lot. I continued walking around the complex passing them by two laps. By the third lap I decided to smile at them both. They looked and smiled back. On the next lap I smiled again and once more they both smiled. My next and final lap I decided instead of smiling I would say hello and ask them how long they lived in the complex, and also how they liked it. I felt this would be an ice breaker to begin with before I ask anything personal, like how the hell does one grow old and stay as happy as they are?

As I turned the corner on my final lap there they were, the cutiest couple walking hand in hand talking away. When we got up to each other I introduced myself and asked if they lived in the complex. Sometimes people just visit so you never know. The man turned and introduced him self as Max and his wife as Sylvia. Max told me he lived in the complex for 20 years and loved it. I shared with Max and Sylvia that I just moved into the complex and have been here for 3 months. I told them that I really liked it better than where I used to live.

Max began to ask me where I worked. I also told him that I am a breast cancer survivor/advocate and that I wrote a book The Empty Cup Runneth Over, which was available at Barnes and Nobles and on my website. He told me that he would love to read my book and also asked if I would sign it if he bought a copy. I told him of course I would.

Max then asked whether I lived alone or was I married. MARRIED!!!!! Now there's a lead in to my question whether they were married and how did they manage to get along and still be together. I told Max and Sylvia I was married for 20 years and that I had been divorced for 3 years. Then it was my turn. I asked politey and you two? Max smiled at Sylvia and turned to me and said well, we just got married about a year ago and while we known each other since we were kids, that he said they were considered newlyweds. I stepped back and never laughed so hard in all my life. I told Max and Sylvia that I was just wondering how they managed to get to a wonderful old age and still be happily married. Max said you marry when you get older. OMG, the joke was on me. It never crossed my mind that Max and Sylvia were newlyweds.

It was at that moment that I learned a great leason, which is one should never judge a book by its cover. I know that's an old saying, but it definitely appropriate in this sitution. Max and Sylvia were newlyweds. But the nice thing is that they new each other as kids, respected each other, and now they were finally married. The best part was that they managed to stay out of nursing homes.

Well,time to get ready to work out again. Maybe I will run into Max and Sylvia again!

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