Thursday, February 25, 2010

Getting Your Mojo Back

Good morning,

It has been awhile since I have blogged on my site. Been really busy writing and reviewing my movie screenplay and also working. Story of my life!

Topic today is "Getting Your Mojo Back." Would love to hear your story as well.

I got my Mojo back when I finally had my breast reconstruction. Doens't sound like a big deal but believe me having no breasts for five years after loosing them to breast cancer is.

What does it feel like to have no breasts at all? Absolutely terrible! I lost my self esteem, and any clothing I put on didn't look good at all. I even at one point felt like a guy, if you can imagine that one.

The worse part was having to wear those heavy prosthesis (fake boobs), which some of you may already know about. They were hot, the bras ugly as hell, and they didn't make me look or feel great at all.

One day I decided not to wear the heavy prosthesis and went to a store to buy small silicone ones, which were more comfortable and much better than the prosthesis I had. I inserted both in my bra and off to grocery shopping I went. As I was shopping I saw the can of soup I was looking for on the bottom shelf and as I bent down to get the soup can I hear "plop." As I looked down at the floor there was my left boob I just bought. Well, not my boob but the silicone breast I just bought. As I looked around I noticed a little boy on the isle looking at me; his eyes open wide with shock. His mother was down the isle and all I heard was "mommy that lady's boob just feel on the floor." I was so humilated at that point I wasn't sure whether to pick up my breast or run out of the store. However, I quickly remembered that I paid $60 dollars for these fake boobs and I wasn't about to waste my money. I quickly picked up my boob, put it in my bra, left my cart and ran out hysterical laughing, leaving the little boy still in shock. Okay, not funny you think? Truly you had to be there. It was hilarious.

It was not long after that incident that I interviewed a young girl for my book "The Empty Cup Runneth Over".April, another breast cancer survivor was sharing her survivor story with me. We began talking about breast reconstruction and I told her I had not considered doing mine yet. What came next I was not prepared for. April decided to flash me her breasts to show me her reconstructed, new breasts with her nipples tattooed as well. Needless to say, I had the shocked look like the little boy in the gorcery isle had when I dropped my boob on the floor. April said that I must get a pair. I laughed hysterical and shared with her my story in the grocery store. Even more of a reason to get new breasts, she said.

The next day I had an appointment with a plastic surgeon and the rest is history. I am happy with my "B" size boobs. Many of my friends asked why didn't I get bigger ones. I laughed and said "Been there, done that." You see I had almost a size "D" before my breast cancer. I was considering having a breast reduction but breast cancer took care of that for me, unfortunately.

A Small B is Fine For Me! I love my new breasts, and going shopping was a blast. I loved shopping for a bathing suit for the first time after loosing my breasts, and everything I that I did put on looked great. It even made my waist look slimmer.

It was after my breast reconstruction that I got my "Mojo" back. I felt like a woman again, clothes looked great, and life is good!!!! That my blog friends is how I got my "Mojo" back.

I hope you all will share how you got your "Mojo" back too.

Have a great day eveyone.



  1. Hi Cindy! What a great story - thanks for sharing so openly and honestly with us. I'll share my 'mojo' story on the 'author to author' blog later today... where does a one-legged lady even begin to look to find her missing 'mojo' anyway???

  2. Cindy, this is a great story! I'm so happy you got your breast reconstruction! I took care of women in the hospital who had this done and what a beautiful thing to give new hope and self-esteem back to them. Ladies need to know that cancer is not a death sentence and that life and beauty can be restored after mastectomy! But most of all girls, ladies and gentleman that early detection is the most important factor in survival. NO Fear and don't ignore your body out of ignorance or not wanting to know. Love thyself. ♥

  3. I've yet to find mine. I lost one breast to breast cancer 18 months ago and even with breast reconstruction which I completed last summer (2009), I do not think of it as a breast. It is a "shape". It has no feeling (most survivors do not talk about this truth) but for many of us and for most of the women I have met who have gone through this, there is no return of sensation to the skin and with a nipple forever gone, (yes they remove the nipple in most mastectomies)there is no sexual sensation. Even reconstructed nipples have no sexual feeling. They might turn a man on but they will not turn you on. For me, that is not a win win. It is offensive to me to think my man would be turned on by something so devastating to me. That is why I thank my lucky stars I kept the other breast. I know not all women will feel the way I do, but this is just my story. Maybe it is still just too fresh in my memory, but I'm still waiting for that mojo. Plus, chemo therapy put me into menopause at age 45 and stripped my body of estrogen, a key component to libido. This is one of the sad truths experienced by breast cancer patients and another reason we need to find a cure, which I believe will only be found by finding the cause. Unless people begin telling the honest truth about how this affects them, the general public will continue believing that a breast cancer patients gets new breasts out of this and that simply is not true. Not for me.

  4. Cindy, I love how you share so openly and that you are able to laugh about that experience. Reading your post and the comments that followed is such an eye opener. Since my cousin, who is only 39 years old, recently had a double mastectomy, I am so much more aware and sensitive to this subject. I have been sharing your posts on facebook where I know she will see them. She is very fortunate to be surrounded by a loving supportive family and to have so much information available to help her get trough these dark days. Keep sharing1